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The unexpected talk with clement I had today is still weighing on my heart now.
But in a good reflective way, I guess.
I need to realise that people actually DO look, do emulate and worse of all.. do judge & scrutinise.
And I need to realise that it's time personal convictions started showing.
I was reading Boy Meets Girl again on the bus in the morning and several statements spoke to me rather sharply.
God, was it your way of preparing me? I thought You were telling me something else.. but now as I look at it again, it just seems completely away from my earlier thoughts, and so much more of what you wanted me to know through clemmie.
The scary one first:
"The evil in our desire typically does not lie in what we want, but in that we want it too much."
Am I wanting it too much? Or perhaps for the wrong reason? Or is it the wrong timing... Are You asking me to wait?
Whatever the reasons or justifications, still I thank you that just when I chose to deliver this situation; disappointment,anger and all, to you.. You did not turn away but reassured me that You are constant. Even when circumstances are not.
Just two pages away:
"God knows all things. But that doesnt mean our task is to discover what He already knows or to worry that we might miss His perfect plan. Our responsibility is to love Him, study His word, deepen our relationship with Him, and learn to evaluate our choices in light of biblical wisdom. If we're doing these things, we can make our decisions in the confidence that we arent somehow missing God's will."
I know You wanted to show me something, but You knew that it was only through my own eyes and realisation will it truly sink in the way You want it to.
Not my will but Yours be done.
